You probably want to read this?

Maybe this is the birthday hormones kicking in. Maybe this is not.

Few hours before my birthday, I feel bad about how things are working. I don’t know if this how the world welcomes me in my twenties. I don’t like it. I don’t like thinking about it.

First, one of my closest friends moved to another city. Not too far away, but far enough from us. I got used to seeing Kim and Christian constantly whenever we feel like it. We never plan anything. I see my spontaneity with them. Yes, true friends make way to see each other. But being not a fan of goodbyes, this is different for me.

In school, although I see my friends, I don’t get to be with them longer than before. I haven’t seen my whole college barkada and I miss them so much. Just us girls. Complete. I thought maybe they don’t even remember my birthday. Or that it’s never as important to them as it is to me. Presumably, this is just me over thinking.

Or that I seem to not get I want on my birthdays. It started long ago. Too long that I can’t even remember anymore. I want to just treat my friends out because I doubt they have time to go to my house. My college friends live too far away.

I have no high school barkada. Few friends probably but not those I make time to be with. That’s the shitty part of my life. High school’s supposed to be that part of everybody’s life where they learn to trust. I discovered it then, but released it just after finding out stuff I can’t even begin to fathom.

Or maybe I was never a good friend.

I miss my sister. I’m sure if she’s here, she has ideas to share with me. What to do for my day.

I just want to sleep this off. But the biggest problem is, I’ve been having a hard try sleeping. Every. Fucking. Time.

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Double F: Food and Friendship

Monday last week, I went to Makati with Kim and Christian. They asked me the day before if I was available; I said I was going to UST but I can meet up with them afterwards. I thought I was going to be done with my errands in UST before lunch time. But then, our coordinator was in the faculty meeting so I had to wait a little. Initially, we were to meet in MRT North Avenue; but because of the delay, I just followed them in Ayala.

While I was on the train, Christian texted that Kim’s medical wasn’t going to be at Makati Med. Instead, it was in a building just in front of Greenbelt 5. I was still thinking about whether to follow to where they were or just wait at Glorietta. But then I didn’t want to stay and eat alone, or even wait alone. So I told Christian that I’ll go to where he was. I almost got lost because, being from the North, I wasn’t very much aware of the routes and streets that will lead me to Greenbelt. Good thing, the instruction given to me by Kuya Guard was very easy.

I finally saw Christian and we went around Greenbelt 3, looking for a place to eat at. And of course, we didn’t get to make up our mind immediately. We were thinking of a place where we can just eat a light meal; we were still waiting for Kim who haven’t eaten lunch like us and wasn’t yet done. We settled then for Red Mango. B

Kim didn’t take much time and told us she was done. So we met with her at Greenbelt 5 and went straight to Mom and Tina’s Bakery Cafe. Kim have been raving about Mom and Tina’s since her first time there. And because we all love food, we got pretty excited that we were going there finally.

Somebody’s excited for his pesto!

PICEPTION. Christian took a phot of us taking a photo. HA HA HA!

Obligatory group picture.

Fettuccine with Basil Pesto. It was delicious! (Christian’s)

Free bread if you order any pasta.

#SELFIE LOLJK

Chicken Spinach Lasagna (Kim’s)

Grilled Chicken Caesar Salad. It reminded me of Vanilla Cupcake Bakery’s Caesar Salad except that this was less salty. (Mine)

Chocolate Fudge Cupcake (Kim’s)

After eating!

After eating, we headed to Bonifacio Global City to chill some more. I asked them if we can go to Fully Booked because I want to see the exhibit they had. The pieces were so cool.

Piles and piles of books!

After touring Fully Booked (we only got to roam around the first two floors… it was too huge!) we walked some more which brought us to Chez Karine Bakery. I wanted to try Sonja’s cupcakes but I was already broke, so that sucked. Christian bought French Macarons and Kim bought her favorite Strawberry Panna Cotta. They had Cookie Butter flavored Macarons. I have yet to try Trader Joe’s Cookie Butter, though. I wonder what the fuss is all about.

I told you, group pictures in places you went were obligatory. LOL

Panna Corra (like Areneo, you know. Ha ha ha!)

Almost all pictures here are from Christian and Kim’s phones. I wish my phone camera’s resolution is just like theirs. <!–3

We wanted to be home early because it was getting dark, it seemed like it was about to rain. It was already raining back in our place, so they thought that we should go eat before we all get stuck in there. We tried iHop, where this two treated me. I’m so sorry, I’m such a poor kid. Hu hu.

Can I just say, I am in love with clouds!

But anyway (enough with me being pathetic LOLJK) it was my first time there, as well as Kim. We were actually still full from our lunch at Mom and Tina’s but they were eager to try iHop.

New York Cheesecake Pancakes. Very sinful!

Specialty Parmesan Chicken Strips

Specialty Fiesta Chicken Wrap

Instagram that shit—er, that food.

<3 this two!

See? I told you this was…

This was while we were walking down the stairs! Hee hee.

We were dropped by the bus at Landmark, where we met up with Kim’s sister and Dad, who brought us back home.

Even though we got stuck in traffic on our way to Trinoma, that Monday was super fun because a) I was with great friends, b) laughing was our other friend, c) who wouldn’t love that day’s foodgasm?

I found out the next day that this is the number of calories that pancake had.

Alam niyo na next ha? Cubao X naman tayo! Also, I want my first time in Yabu and Slappy Cakes with you two, too. Or better yet, with the whole gang! Yung totootayong tatlo na lang ba magbabarkada? Ha ha ha! Love yew two~~ <3

Remember this?

Remember when we were so keen on making our barkada complete? Remember when we used to cry at the most funny and petty things? Remember how sophomore year was a drama scene? Remember when we had this made and decided to call our group Aztig? Thinking about it now, it sounds so jeje. Ha ha ha!

I miss you. I miss having you around. I miss just talking on the phone with you for hours. I miss all the times we hung out. I miss having a best friend who I can be physically with.

I do miss you. But I’m not asking for anything anymore. I’m fine with both our decisions but seeing this friendship bracelet made me reminisce.

What would life be if we never had that huge fight? I really am curious.

You know what is the most ironic thing with all of these? Now that the barkada‘s complete, it’s my friendship with you that is now out of my hand.